Thursday, October 7, 2010

Last post for a few days!

I've been having such a week.

I've felt like shit for days because I PMS for about two weeks, and on Sunday, genius me, I kicked my bed frame and cracked my pinky toe. So I've been limping since then. I wasn't even doing it out of anger, I was just getting up there to sit and read a damn book.

Anyway... I spent my day today getting ready for my trip to Orlando. My mom went to a work-related event at Epcot and the company was given 700 free tickets to Disney World. My brother and I have six between us, since nobody else will be using them. So tomorrow, we're driving down and making use of the time we have before we have jobs and can't make trips like that anymore.

My stepsister and her husband and their two small children have been here since Saturday, and it's been a little hectic. So when I finally, FINALLY had a few minutes of peace and quiet while everyone else was out, I popped in my Sherlock Holmes DVD for a Robert Downey Jr. fix.

I kind of half-walked, half-limped to the kitchen (I didn't have any athletic tape on my toes for a few hours, to let the skin breathe, making walking a bit more painful than it's been), made myself some lunch, and stretched out on my bed for maximum RDJ enjoyment.

That's right. I think he's hot. I don't care that he's short, either- in all my fantasies he's like 6'5".

And for the first time in four days, I had an orgasm, while half-listening to some rather brilliant back-and-forth between Holmes and Hotson*. Now, four days without masturbating is a LONG time for me, since I usually do it two or three times a day, but I just haven't felt like it. My sex drive sometimes plummets while I'm all hormonal and shit, and sometimes it doesn't. This time it did.

Of course, the sound of small children running around outside my room didn't exactly put me in the mood. That'll kill the moment for sure.

So my first self-love session in days lasted all of about two minutes, but it was good. I feel better despite the cramps I'm already getting. I'll feel even better in a week or so when my period is over, but for right now I'm okay.

The only really shitty part of today was when my stepdad yelled at me. I hadn't even stepped out of the shower yet- I was giving my legs the final once-over to make sure I hadn't missed any huge patches of hair- and he stood at the door of the bathroom to berate me for a simple mistake. Last week, my mom came home and announced that the car tags had come in, and one was left in the window that said "2003 Toyota", and guess what? I DRIVE A 2003 TOYOTA. I didn't think about the fact that I just replaced my tag in May (two weeks early!), or that it was a Florida tag instead of a Georgia one, I just slapped the sticker on my car and went about my day. Well, apparently it was for my stepdad's car and instead of calmly asking me for the card back he saw fit to call me stupid (not in those words, but still) and I am getting REALLY sick of being treated like an idiot. I don't know how my mom deals with it- he treats her like she can't make a decision for herself and if she disagrees with him suddenly she's stupid, but if my brother or I say ANYTHING that sounds even remotely disrespectful, he flies off the handle.

On one such occasion, he came into my room while I was trying to watch a movie I'd received from Netflix that day, and basically lectured me for twenty minutes about how I'm wasting my life and blah blah blah and how it's "unthinkable" that someone my age has never had a boyfriend and bullshit bullshit BULLSHIT. It's my Goddamned choice to not just go out and find any dumbass that'll have me. I'm willing to wait for what I want, and while I don't want Prince Fucking Charming I do have a few standards that HAVE to be met, like:

1. They can't be stupid. Like, I can forgive someone who's a bit goofy, but if you're just an out-and-out moron then we won't have anything to talk about.

2. It sounds ridiculously shallow, but he has to be at least two or three inches taller than me. This is because I am tall (5' 11") and I want to feel small. Unless it's a woman, then I could really give a shit.

3. I don't care if he's a bit overweight, or not really, really, ridiculously good-looking. Just so long as he isn't the Human Blob (already had that after me, don't care to have it again) or, you know... looks like he went bobbing for French fries at some point or something.

And of course, there are the other minor details of what I like and what I don't. But believe it or not, I have met a man or two that fit every description and they're either married or just plain uninterested. So it may be a while before I meet someone, and like I said, I'm willing to wait.

It's killing me a tiny bit inside every day, but I'll wait.

And with that, I'll sign off because there's more laundry to be done and it's getting late! See ya!

* Hotson is Watson played by Jude Law. Their joke, not mine. it totally works, though.

UPDATE: I spent a ton of money I didn't have to spend, but I had a great time in Orlando, last night's hormone-fueled meltdown notwithstanding. I got presents for my mom (birthday AND Christmas!), a really cool coffee mug and an awesome Alice in Wonderland top that just looks like a nice top you could buy in a department store. I think I'll make her a pair of earrings to wear with it.

The only bad thing? I can barely walk. I really pushed it yesterday and I'm paying for it. My brother was going too fast for me at the end of the day and I was moving like a zombie in fast-forward. And then I had to drive home today, so now my toes feel like someone smashed them with a sledgehammer. Being at Disneyworld and trying to get on and off some of the rides was so difficult, because I didn't have my glasses- I can see fine without them but my depth perception is so bad. Sure, it makes for a more interesting ride (seriously, have you ever ridden a roller coaster and screamed because you thought part of the ride was going to hit you in the face?) but it's not something you want to deal with in your day-to-day life.

Also, what kind of moron takes a four-year-old on the motherfucking Tower of Terror? I heard so many screaming kids in that building that my ears are STILL ringing.

When I'm not so tired I'm going cross-eyed I'll write more. Later!


  1. dude, can i come over and smash your step dad in the god damn face? i had a step dad beginning in first grade and it sucked. i mean he wasn't abusive in any way, but he would always get in between my mom and i when we'd be talking or even arguing. like he had anything to do with it. there were times when he would use the belt on me when i got in trouble, which just fueled my hatred for him even more bc like, 'you're not my dad bro' haha. luckily i like him now that i'm grown and he has no rule over me. how old are you and when can you move out?

  2. I'm 21. I actually had to move back home cos I lost my job and what little money I was making.

    And it wasn't always like that with my stepdad. But he's 64 now and all of a sudden he turned into this cranky old man. And he likes to pretend that it's not stressful when we have company over but it's just as hard on him as it is on everybody else.